Saturday Morning NyQuil Hangover: Wizard Warship.

I'm just like every other turd, meaning I have a gigantic boner for THE Wizard. UNlike every other turd, I'm (still) powered by the abuse of NyQuil and (as always) hate. Sooo Today's SMNH is about the Wizard. Sort of.

More "Meta-Wizard." That's a thing, right? Meta? Anyway...

It started when I had an epiphany, reaching out to my brain-thing through a waxy, NyQuil haze...

Jus Oborn was Dr. Teeth.

Holy shit.

So before he was that goofy, fat dork playing killer doom jams, and even before he had those gnarly death metal vocals in Lord of Putrefaction, has was ACTUALLY Dr. Teeth.

So basically, this got my thinking about the other members, past and present, and their other musical projects...

Starting with the first 2 to leave, Tim Bagshaw and Mark Greening went onto form Ramesses. Although I prefer their 1st full album, "Misanthropic Alchemy," right now I give you their Second. Take The Curse.


Next up is Justin Greaves, who didn't stick around very long, but has some neat musical pies with his fingers in them. Teeth of Lions Rules the Divine, Khang, and Iron Monkey. Here's some stuff from Iron Monkey.

Ghuff, this is taking more time than I thought...let's continue...

Liz Buckingham. Yeah. HER.

She used to be in 13. But She also used to be in Sourvein. Which has an album called Salvation.

That terrifying one, Tas...

Holy shit, right?

...he's done a bunch of shit too. Sabbah Navathani is harsh and rad. Eight Hands for Kali's one album, Himalayan Necromantia, is one 55 minutes long song, but it's GOOD. It doesn't wear on you, or get tedious...

Oh and there's Great Coven. Which kinda sucks but is kinda cool at the same time.

I'm done. I could spend a whole day on this shit, but it's stupid, and I need more coffee.

Rollins:"Cram It, Christmas."

Growing up, one of my favorite things about X-mas season was my parents would bust out this sweet comp album. A Lump Of Coal.

It was just about the coolest thing that could happen around this time of year, musically, for a young child growing up in the post-grunge alt-indie-rock-ish laden early to mid 90's. Except for maybe Jingle Cats.

Anyhoo...probably the best thing about this album, and what has always been the most profound in my mind, is the Henry Rollins version of "Twas the Night Before Christmas."

This is frightening stuff. Really. And here it is solo, in case you don't want a Crash Test Dummies version of "The First Noel," or "Bring A Torch Jeannette Isabella" by Carnival Art. (Which is actually kinda neat too.)

Bottom line is: gather up all your little nieces and nephews at your family Solstice Celebration, corner them in a room so they can't leave, then play this Rollins track for them to crush any sort of positive associations they may have with the Night Before Christmas.

Then start to yell at them about how Mithras is really Jesus, and pagan rituals...etc while getting progressively more trashed on Rum and Eggnog.

BONUS:

Lovecraft themed X-mass SHITS.

Hold Your Breath

Here's something that has been on HEAVY rotation lately. Super groovy, heavy riffs, great vocal melodies, killer drumming...
My only problem initially was the garishly Ozzie-esque vocals, which didn't take very long to get over. Taken into account how absolutely great this album is, upon more listening, the vocal issue began to get pushed further and further back in my mind.

Check it out.

Terra Firma-Harm's Way

Saturday Morning NyQuil Hangover.

Hellbender are some guys from Tennessee.

Imagine waking up nude in some backwoods with a Nyquil haze over your eyes and the lingering taste of moonshine stuck in your throat.

And you can hear banjos in the distance.

Chances are, this is what will be playing in your head.

They have their tunes on the website. I Highly recommend seeing them live if they play anywhere near you.
And buy their stuff. They deserve it.